1) There should be personal ads for socks. Entries would consist of the following.
Single white ankle sock with pink trim seeks mate of the same description.
Must love tennis.
Seeking: Unmatched argyle with character.
Toe reinforcement a plus.
Sexy thigh high seeks slinky mate for evening rendezvous.
Rips, runs or tears need not apply.
2) All Mexican restaurants should convert to electronic menus equipped with a menu-specific search engine. The customer would type in the items they want on their plate (taco, chile relleno, tostada, rice, beans), and the number of the combination containing these items would appear. This highly efficient system would revolutionize the industry by simplifying customer selection and cutting down on the quantity of special orders. This would also completely eliminate embarassing mispronunciations of foreign foods.
3) An Emergency Lane at 24-hour stores like Wal-Mart or Kroger. We have all abided by the code of the 15 Items or Less Lane, which I think means that we deserve an Emergency Lane for good behavior. The 24-hour Emergency Lane would provide lightning-speed checkout for people in the midst of crisis, i.e., First Aid Kits, batteries or toilet paper. Obviously, special dispensation would have to be allowed for new mothers, or husbands running errands on national holidays. While the Emergency Lane may go unused for hours at a stretch, customers would appreciate it in their time of need. Let’s face it; no one buys a plunger at two in the morning without having a serious problem on their hands.